10 REASONS YOU NEED TO DITCH THAT TOXIC FRIEND.

1. He/she may get upset when you have and spend time with other friends.

A jealous friend is a sign of insecurities. A person who is secure in who they are will never feel threatened by anyone else. You are not required to have one friend and one friend only. Being jealous of another friend can lead to tension and make you feel like you have to hide things from your friend so you won’t upset them.

2. He/she can’t or wont accept their own faults and flaws.

If you have communicated to your friend something that they have done that may have made you upset and they automatically become defensive thats a huge red flag right there. When a person can not accept constructive criticism or your opinions and feelings on their actions, shows that they are not okay with being wrong. It okay to be wrong and make mistakes. No one is perfect but if your friend can not accept their wrongs it will eventually weigh on you.

3. He/she only contacts you when they need a favor or advice, never to just “check in on you”.

Being in a friendship is a two way street. If you constantly feel like this relationship is only being help up by you, Let that friend go. You may not be open to just asking for help or advice but that doesn’t mean you don’t go through hard times. If your friend constantly only hits you up to just talk about themselves and never not once asked how you are doing, shows your friend is selfish and self center.

4. He/she encourages bad behavior.

Your friend should always want whats best for you. If your friend constantly puts you or remains silent in situations that can lead to a negative outcome for you, does he or she really have you in their best interest? Personally if i see my friend about to do anything that isn’t beneficial for them I will be that first person in their ear trying to talk them down from it.

5. He/she tells your business to others.

Now Im not the only who whose heard things you’ve told your friend in private come out another persons mouth. Its like a punch in the gut. You confided in your friend and they took what you said and told someone else. Now you begin to lose trust in your friend. You make sure to watch what you say around your friend. Friendships should be transparent and if you can’t let it out to your friend thats a friendship you may need to take a step back from.

6. He/she doesn’t know how to properly communicate.

Just like any other relationship communicating is essential in a friendship. If you’re uncomfortable (or vise versa) to communicate certain things to your friend because you’re worried how they may react is a major red flag. Friends should always be open and honest with one another.

7. You feel exhausted after every interaction you’ve had with him/her.

A friend who drains you mentally is exhausting. Their personality and or characteristics have become overwhelming to deal with. Mental health isn’t anything to play with and if your friend is causing you to fell mentally exhausted after an encounter with them isn’t healthy. I’ve dealt with a friend like this. Over time her negative energy was draining me. Now every situation is different but if a friendship of yours is messing with your mental health put YOU first and keep it moving.

8. He/She Blocks or sabotages your blessings.

Ever had anything good going for yourself ? But your friend isn’t supportive. Instead of support and uplifting you they tear you down. You share good news with your friend and they’re not happy or excited for you. If they have a negative response to anything positive when it comes to you simply proves they’re a hater.

9. He/she tries to compete with you.

There should be no races between friends. It should never matter who has the better job, relationship, or material things. What you have or don’t have doesn’t make you any better or any less. Everyone moves at their own pace, everyones situation is different. The second a friend is going out of their way to be better then you just proves that they receive gratification from watching you fail or being less than them.

10. He/she is Self-centered.

There is nothing worse than a selfish person. A friend who makes everything and anything about them. From where you guys hang out, to what you discuss. They always wants to talk about themselves and never allow you to get a word out when you’re talking about yourself. A true friend would always want to hear about you and would genuinely enjoy just sitting back and listening.

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Its okay to let go of that toxic friend. Don’t let the amount of years you’ve known a person determine if you will hold on to that friendship or not. Sometimes people change and its okay. Its okay to move on from a friendship if you feel its not benefiting you. If you’re in a relationship of any shorts its cause this person benefits you in one way or another, but soon as you’re giving all and not receiving take that as a sign to DITCH THAT FRIEND.

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Thank you to Oddalis (@oddalis_lianette) for helping me put this together. We have been friends for over 10 years. We had our ups and downs but no matter what we have always remained friends, even in the moments we weren’t in communication with one another. We have both grown and now are able to communicate and speak open and freely with one another. I appreciate you.